D'Arcy from Winnipeg
Solution Architecture, Business & Entrepreneurship, Microsoft, and Adoption

Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Friday, August 14, 2009 4:34 AM

If you follow me on Twitter, read my blog, or have me on Live Messenger, you know that over the last few months I’ve had bouts of reflection, thoughtfulness, and philosophical rambling. Many of you have pinged me asking if everything was ok and I wanted to thank everybody who voiced concern, whether it was a tweet, an im conversation, an email, or breakfast in a Vancouver restaurant that I’m pretty sure was a front for a secret police command center.

I couldn’t share with you what was on my heart then: the emotions, the stresses, the hope, the anticipation…I tried to reach out during a very private time through glimpses and once again my community of friends supported me even though I couldn’t tell you the whole story.

But now I can.

We all have goals in life…aspirations that we work towards, destinations that we fix our sites on and set out for. For some achieving those goals comes easy while others strain and struggle. Perseverance, commitment, hope, faith, and fortitude become the valued commodities in life for us, all the while realizing that we really have no control over so many facets of our lives. It’s a perilous place to be, balancing ourselves so we don’t fall into a pit of despair, anger, and self pity, while still not allowing ourselves to fall onto the side of hope for fear that its a false one. The only seemingly safe place to be is on that beam, balancing…continually swaying from one side to the next but keeping yourself from falling in to either one.

For my wife and I, that’s what the better part of a decade has been like. Almost three years ago, after  numerous other years of journeying towards one destination, we changed to a different road and a new course when we created a file with the local private adoption agency. And then we waited.

This past May, through a friend of a family member, we were introduced to the woman who would become our birth mother. On July 21st the phone rang at 1:20 AM and our birth mother informed us that a beautiful baby girl had been born. She was placed with us two days later.

Today is day 22, one of the many milestones in the adoption process and not the last. Over the last 21 days I’ve experienced something that no words I could type can express. Entering my new role, that of being a dad, has been beyond anything I could dream of. The depth of love one feels for their child is something unbelievably profound.

Our journey isn’t over. There’s still official legal proceedings that need to be arranged and other loose ends to tie up. In a very real way, this is just the beginning of another chapter in our lives…and one filled with new characters. Through the openness that we have in our adoption we’ve been exposed to an entirely new group of people that we know call family and that we look forward to getting to know better.

This process has spurred me on to be a vocal advocate for adoption and help demystify the process surrounding it. I’ve started a new blog called Fellowship of the Fathers that you can follow if you’re interested in adoption, parenting, and fatherhood related topics.

As for our little girl: her name is Sadie, she’s beautiful, very strong, and in excellent health. She’s already watched her first football game (Montreal Alouettes of course), already has her first I’m a PC shirt (thank you Microsoft eStore…but c’mon guys, you gotta get more kids stuff!), and no matter what my wife tells you, she will be Princess Leia for Halloween this year. So without further ado…

Sadie.HelloWorld();

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D




Feedback

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Way to go D'Arcy!!!!!!

Welcome to the club. My life is in a better world as a result of the 3 girls that I have and I know yours will be as well.

Being is geek is awesome, as you already know but it in no way compares to being a dad. The best of the 2 worlds is nirvana and there is lots tech to do with kids!

Enjoy my friend!
Will 8/14/2009 5:38 AM | Will Craddock

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

let me just say... CONGRATS

Life will never be the same, but this is a great thing. Your perspective on life is now going to be 100% different and again, this is a great thing.

Welcome to the club. 8/14/2009 7:28 AM | Derik Whittaker

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Holy box of diapers batman!!!! Congratulations dood!

Your life will never be the same again and will be enriched in so many ways you will never really know what it was like without a little munchkin in your life.

I am so happy for you and your wife!!!!!!!!

Love ya dood!
God Bless you your wife and the little one!!!!!
8/14/2009 7:28 AM | Rod Paddock

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

There are a myriad of commenting opportunities running through my head but I can't bring myself to ruin this news by typing them out. This is fantastic to hear. Many congratulations to you and your wife.

Oh what the hell: make sure you open any gifts from Belcham before giving them to her. 8/14/2009 7:34 AM | Kyle Baley

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Congrats, D'Arcy!

Becoming a parent was one of the best things that ever happened to me, and I couldn't be more delighted for you.

So when do you start her on karaoke? :-) 8/14/2009 7:43 AM | G. Andrew Duthie

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Love hearing stories like this :). Sounds like she's already become a huge blessing in your life! Congratulations and I hope you enjoy every minute of the next chapter of your life!! 8/14/2009 7:50 AM | John Miller

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

congrats! welcome to the land of the few, the proud. :) 8/14/2009 7:59 AM | Javier Lozano

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Congratulations on entering the most tiring but imho most rewarding path of life. :D

8/14/2009 8:15 AM | Shane Courtrille

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Welcome to the the best club on the planet. It's the most rewarding, demanding, emotionally exhausting & uplifting experience you will ever have in your entire life.

My wife and I are very happy for you, D'Arcy. A huge congrats! 8/14/2009 9:15 AM | John Bristowe

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter


When I read the title of this blog I figured, oh geez he quit his job (again) and is moving into another specialty field (again). :-)

Congratulations on the new addition to your family, you and your wife are going to make wonderful parents.
8/14/2009 9:28 AM | William Highfield

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Congrats to you and your wife D'Arcy! 8/14/2009 9:29 AM | Steven R

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

It's hard sometimes in life when it has such drastic emotional up's and downs. However, every now and then life does send each one of us that chance for something more wonderful to help balance it all out.

We have never met D'Arcy and hope that we will some day.

Congratulations D'Arcy to your new family and a *nod* as you embark upon your new life as a father.

(It is always good to see good things happen to good people.) 8/14/2009 9:38 AM | Matthew Randall

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

That is AWESOME. Congratulations! 8/14/2009 10:15 AM | Ben Scheirman

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Wow man... congrats, she's beautiful and I know you will be a great dad. Very happy for you. 8/14/2009 10:38 AM | Chris G. Williams

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

an uber congrats man! Gorgeous ! 8/14/2009 10:44 AM | Winson W

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Congrats man! Thats awesome! 8/14/2009 10:52 AM | Donn

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Congratulations to you and your family, D'Arcy! Wonderful news. 8/14/2009 10:54 AM | Julie Lerman

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Well, well. I extremelly happy for you bro. Congratulation on this life changing event. I wish you all the best to you, your wife and beautiful Sadie.

Good luck for the rest my friend.

Etienne 8/14/2009 11:04 AM | ET

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Congratulations, very happy for you! 8/14/2009 1:21 PM | Bobby Borszich

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Congratulations Darcy!
My sister in law, Kelly Phipps Grove, is a huge adoption advocate (having dealt with 6 international adoptions). She teaches classes on adoption and runs enlighteningadoption.blogspot.com

Jake Grey - MVP lead 8/14/2009 5:11 PM | Jake Grey

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Up until the fifth paragraph I was convinced you were secretly struggling with your private gayness and aching - nay, throbbing - to come out.

When can I come over and meet your daughter, butthead? 8/14/2009 7:13 PM | Eric Legault

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Congrats, D'Arcy! Welcome to the fantastic world of fatherhood! Oh, the many adventures that await you. Make sure you check out http://signingtime.com in a few months. I did it with both of my boys and it's hard to express the wonder of being able to converse with your child when they're 8 months old! Congrats, again, my friend. 8/16/2009 12:38 AM | James Kovacs

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Congrats D'Arcy! That is fantastic! 8/17/2009 9:16 AM | David Wesst

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Congrats, of course. :)

She's positively adorable, and I'm thrilled to pieces for you that you've found her. 8/19/2009 6:00 PM | Rachel Reese

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

I'm catching up on blogs/news (a bit late)... Congrats, man... big news indeed 8/19/2009 9:22 PM | Michael Easter

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Hey Darcy, I just saw this post and I'm very happy for you. Congratulations man! 8/21/2009 9:10 AM | Carlos Figueroa

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Little late catching up on my reading list but Wow, glad I took the time to read this and congrats!!

I wish the best for you and your new family! 8/21/2009 11:39 AM | Cory

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Holy Crap! I feel like I'm Rip Van Winkle waking up from a long nap and the whole world is different! How in the heck did I miss this!?!

Congratulations man! You're going to be a great father and I'm really happy for you and your wife. The world needs kids raised by great parents and well, you're freaking awesome. 8/24/2009 9:58 AM | George W. Clingerman

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Wow, I'm floored. I go away for a few days because of surgery and now you are a Dad. Wow. Blown away. Big step sir and one that I commend you and your wife for taking. Congrats to the both of you. 8/29/2009 5:00 PM | Keith Elder

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Congratulations D'Arcy, this is an incredible time for you, and I wish you and your wife all the best.

I hope things are going good, she's a beautiful little girl. 9/12/2009 10:43 AM | Mitchell Lee

# re: Hello World – My New Role And My Life’s Next Chapter

Congratulations on the new addition. She's positively gorgeous.
Let us know if you need a Flame's jersey for her ;-) 9/14/2009 11:06 PM | PrincessJenn

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